During a time where every one is so negative we often seem to, maybe not forget about what makes us happy, but we certainly don’t share it. Three years ago today, my cat Angel died. In my arms, and it was definitely the hardest experience of my adult life. I was a very sad, broken version of myself. I went to work, came come cried, watched Pitch Perfect, cried some more, turned on Glee, and cried even more.
Angel was my first real pet, I was 12 when we got her, two weeks after my Grandma had passed away. She was the first thing to make us genuinely happy. Not only was she the first happy thing to happen to us during such a sad time. She also is the reason I am able to cope as much as I can with my anxiety. When I was younger and the panic attacks had just started it was (and still is) the hardest at night. Angel would come and lay on my chest so I could pet her until I fell asleep. When she’d lay on me I would subconsciously match my breathing to hers, and I learnt that if I could slow my breathing down then the panic attack would, if not end, it wouldn’t get worse. (You can read more about her here)
I don’t like to be sad, honestly no one does. So on a day when I feel kind of sad, I thought it would be a good idea to focus on things that make me happy.
- My family. My mother, sisters and I are all very close. I know they’ll always be there if and whenever I need them. But it goes beyond them, my uncles, aunts cousins are all the best. It’s always such an amazing time when we all get together.
- My Kids. Ok so first of all, I am not a mother. Oddly enough that’s a sentence that I say all of the time. I have never been able to take care of a child with out becoming attached. I genuinely love, the kids that I care for, even long after they’ve moved on I still miss them. It’s hard to not be filled with happiness when they’re around. There is nothing better then the unconditional love given by children. A love so genuine that can you feel it in their hugs.
- Maizy, and Tigre. I got Maizy a little bit after Angel died, she was the turning point of my sadness. Maizy was the perfect cure for the sadness that I felt, While she doesn’t always love to cuddle, she is always near. She’s literally on the couch right behind me while I am writing this. I got Tigre in June three years ago. It took a few weeks of forced affections, before he finally crawled into my lap on his own, and now spends most of his time there.
- Skittles. OK this is kind of silly, but Skittles are my favorite candy. Although, candy in general makes me happy. Weather it’s Skittles, or gummy bears, or sour gummy worms, They all make me happy.
- Makeup. I mean there isn’t much to explain makeup makes me happy. From the soothing routine of applying it, to the mini boost in confidence it gives.
- Books. I didn’t start reading until after I was out of school. Peter Pan and Wendy was the first book that I actually read, and I found that it was a way to escape my anxiety for a bit. Because sometimes, fantasy is better than reality.
- Music. We spend all day listening to music. We don’t watch T.V. I allow Sharon to watch a movie, or T.V. First thing in the morning, while she wakes up the rest of the way. She comes over so early, and is still very tired, so when she doesn’t have any friends over to play with I get to cuddle her on the couch while we watch a movie.
- The Sun. I miss the sun. I love when it’s sunny. This is the time of the year is when I miss it the most. It’s been so gloomy lately. As soon as the sun starts to come out in spring I drag the kids out to play to go for a walk, just any excuse to go out in the sunshine.
- The Beach. I love the beach. The town I live in is off of Lake Huron, and our beach is beautiful. Our beach is kept clean, and the water is always so clear. It’s also very cold, but there’s nothing better then icy cold water on a day when the air hurts your skin. Also oddly enough the beach is the only place, where there can be tons of people, and I don’t fall into a panic attack. I forget that gong to the beach late afternoon, is not something that every one is able to do. I try to remember to keep a swim suit and towel in my car for unplanned visits, but more often then not I end up in the lake hoping to keep my clothes as dry as possible, while failing.
- This blog. My blog, and you guys make me happy. I love being able to pretend to be social through my blog, and all of you guys, are so lovely. Aside from that one person that one time who left a nasty comment on my Instagram (which I deleted).
I hope you all take the time to think about and appreciate all of the things that make you happy. So please tell me in the comments, what makes you happy. I’d love to hear about it.